Trauma Therapy

Impacts from trauma are a personal experience.

At some point in everyone’s life, they experience events that change how they see themselves and the world around them. When the event is scary, life-threatening, or exceptionally painful, it can leave a lasting mark, an emotional wound.

Over time, some people heal from those wounds. The hurt fades, the memory gets blurrier, and the person rarely ends up here, reading about trauma therapy.

For other people, maybe even you, the wound doesn’t heal. That can mean a diagnosis of PTSD (Post-traumatic Stress Disorder), but not always. Trauma symptoms can still interfere with your life, even if they don’t meet that threshold.

Either way, wounds from trauma can fester.

Trauma varies in intensity.

With PTSD, the pain is evident in its debilitating nature. There is a general understanding that specific experiences are traumatic, including sexual assault, physical abuse, severe accidents, traumatic death of a loved one, etc. I call these experiences the “Big Ts” or big traumas.

There are “Little ts,” too. These are harder for people to see, notice, acknowledge, and tend to appropriately.

These little traumas are experiences that, if they happened just once, likely wouldn’t be traumatic. They are annoying, upsetting, frustrating, but probably not traumatic.

The repetition of little traumas over a long stretch of time can become debilitating.

Avoiding the issue doesn’t reduce the effects of trauma.

How do you know you need healing from a “little t?”

Often, there are the stories you just don’t want to tell; you feel guilty or embarrassed about your trauma. Maybe, it’s just hard to remember large chunks of your life.

Then, some memories pop up uninvited – causing sleep difficulty, bad dreams, irritability, or difficulty feeling connected to your life and the people around you. You work hard not to think about it. Being bored is your enemy.

“Oh, that was a long time ago.”

“I don’t think it bothers me anymore.”

“Other people experienced worse things; my experience wasn’t as bad.”

Michael’s Story – A Thousand Tiny Cuts

Michael* is at his locker with his bag balanced on his knee as he gets organized for his next class. He hears familiar voices and looks to his right, and there they are, the “Cool” kids. As he watches them approach, he sees their leader, Brad*, look at him. For a split-second, Michael thinks maybe, just maybe today, the cool kids might talk to him.

Brad elbows Cole, they nod, and Michael’s hopes are dashed as Cole bumps into him, knocking his bag down, causing books and pens to go sliding across the hallway floor. The echoes of laughter ring in Michael’s ears as he tries to rescue his belongings from under the feet of students going to class. Some students step over Michael’s things, while others play keep away with his math book.

Being hassled by peers would be annoying, perhaps embarrassing, but most likely forgotten with time as a single incident. But what if it happens again the next day, the day after that, and then every day? No matter where Michael goes, Brad and his crew track him down.

Repeated offenses

After the first couple of times, Michael watches the clock before every class’s end. His stomach tightens into knots. He doesn’t hear what the teacher said and forgets to write down the homework because he wants to get to his next class without being noticed. But it’s to no avail. Brad and his crew find Michael again.

After a week and a half, Michael wakes up nauseous and tells his mom he doesn’t feel good. He needs to stay home. But he can’t stay home forever.

A few more weeks pass, and Michael can’t sleep. Dread for tomorrow keeps him awake, and his grades begin to slip. Michael watches around corners for Brad and his crew while hiding in bathrooms, skipping lunch, and carrying everything in his backpack until his body aches.

A few months more, and Michael has lost weight. He keeps to himself and moves through the halls with his head down. Michael’s family notices that he isn’t his happy-go-lucky self anymore.

Eventually, Brad and his crew find new kids to torment. But Michael keeps an eye out, as they will still come after him from time to time. He finds it hard not to worry, jumps if startled, and has dreams about being tormented in the halls. Thinking about what happened makes him upset. He feels like no one could like him and finds it difficult to trust.

Michael may have grown up and become moderately successful while holding a decent job and having some friends. But he struggles with feeling connected, finds that he is more irritable than others around him, and is just on edge all the time. Relationships fall apart, and he struggles with anxiety.

Michael has felt this way for so long that it all feels familiar, but it’s holding him back.

Don’t be like Michael; seek help!

Whether big or little, persistent trauma impacts all aspects of your life.
In Michael’s case, the trauma he experienced started during his teenage years at school, but those experiences caused ongoing struggles with his personal life.

If you have unresolved trauma, whether it be “Big Ts” or “little ts,” I can help.

Untether yourself from your past painful experiences so that you can step into a new chapter in your life.

Contact me today!

*Names changed to protect client confidentiality.